Excess Weight and Body Fats? Laugh Them All Off

By Ahmed Hajouj.


Have you ever heard of the truism “jokes are half meant”? If you have, do you believe in it? If you have not, then now, you have read of it and maybe if you read on, you’d be able to think of a joke of your own which could be half or full-meant. 

I gathered some of the most popular jokes on health and fitness over the Internet and after laughing about them, I thought maybe I could tell something that would prove that these jokes were born out of the sometimes painful and bitter realities of life.

It would really be nice to have a slim and really fit body but not everybody is blessed with such. There are some people, no matter how much food they take, including calories, fats and all, who never gain weight or grow fat. But to those who are blessed with tons of excesses in fats and weight, trimming down is one of the most difficult tasks in the world. Especially if “exercise” and “dieting” are alien terms for them, this humorous analysis of how the human body was arranged is just right:

I don't exercise at all. If God had wanted me to touch my toes He would have put them up higher on my body.

Sometimes, in the lowest point of your weight-loss campaign wherein only your weight doesn’t go down and the rest, most especially your ego, has dropped down beyond the base, you find ways to console your ultra-bruised and dying ego. And one is to consider that every shape is accepted in the society:

I'm in shape. Round is a shape.

And then there’s the matter of aging. To some, the question is: why change the course of time? A person’s age adds up and along with the increase of the age is the gradual decline of the body. It is just a normal process. Why put pressure on yourself and your failing body? Age, time and fats are ganging up on you, three to one: 

The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then, your body and your fat have become such inseparably good friends.

To choose whether to follow what you think or what you feel is another difficult task. It is an honorable and praiseworthy thought of working to get into shape. But, what would you do if the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak?

Every time I get the urge to exercise, I lie down till the feeling passes.

And then there are some people whose form of exercise is sharpening their wits. They could utter one-liner wisecracks that could make it to the funniest sitcom on TV:

The only exercise you get is jumping to conclusions.

And who said that only the adults are having a hard time being friendly with exercising? Take a trip to a school PE schedule and you might be surprised to hear some outrageous quips coming from the tots that you think are advocates of physical fitness:

My gym teacher told me to touch my toes. I said, "I don't have that kind of relationship with my feet. Can I just wave?"
Excuses are the most popular forms of escape from the campaign towards getting fit and healthy. Here are some excuses that you may have sheepishly used once, twice or maybe more than thrice:
• But it was my birthday, so I had to eat the whole cake.
• I had to get the bitter taste out of my mouth from eating the so-called dish, so I had an ice cream.
• If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.
• If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the diet soda cancels out the calories in the candy bar.
• If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.
• Only eat things that have been broken into pieces; that way, all the calories fall out.
• Chocolate is a vegetable. How, you ask? Chocolate is derived from cacao beans. Bean = vegetable. Sugar is derived from either sugar CANE or sugar BEETS. Both are plants, which places them in the vegetable category. Thus, chocolate is a vegetable.
And there’s just the hardheaded approach, the I-really-don’t-care-whether-I’m-fat-or-slim attitude that you may pronounce as a hopeless case. It’s actually very easy to tell, once you hear this line, it’s it:
I'm not into working out. My philosophy is no pain, no pain.
Getting fit and staying healthy is not a laughable matter – or is it? One thing sure is that it isn’t an easy task. It involves determination, hard work and some light moments on the side. After all, laughing – for a long period – can help shake those excess fats off. And even the doctors agree it’s the world’s best medicine.

Aerobic Exercise for Weight Loss Can Be Fun

By Ahmed Hajouj.


The word aerobic literally means "with oxygen" or "in the presence of oxygen." Aerobic exercise is any activity that uses large muscle groups, can be maintained continuously for a long period of time and is rhythmic in nature. Aerobic exercises utilize oxygen as the major fuel for sustaining activity for relatively long periods.

In general, aerobic exercises are those activities that require large muscle work, elevate the heart rate to between 60 percent and 80 percent of maximal heart rate, are continuous in nature and are of 15 to 60 minutes in duration. An aerobically fit individual can work longer, more vigorously and achieve a quicker recovery at the end of the aerobic session.

Aerobic exercises fall in two categories: 

Low to Moderate Impact aerobics – These include walking, swimming, stair climbing, step classes, light water aerobics, rowing and cross-country skiing. Nearly anyone in reasonable health can engage in some low- to moderate-impact exercise. Brisk walking burns more calories than jogging for the same distance because it takes more time to walk than jog that distance and poses less risk for injury to muscle and bone. 

High-Impact aerobics – Activities that belong to this group include running, dance exercise, tennis, racquetball and squash. High-impact aerobics should be performed on alternate days. People who are overweight, elderly, out of condition or have an injury or other medical problem should do them even less frequently and only with clearance from their doctor. 

Here are some of the many aerobic exercises you can do and because of the variety you have to choose from, it can not only take the bordum out of doing it, it can make doing it downright fun as well.


1. Walking 
Walking is a popular form of exercise because it requires little in terms of equipment or facilities. Walking an extra 20 minutes each day will burn off 7 pounds of body fat per year. Longer, moderately-paced daily walks are best for losing weight. 


2. Jogging/Running
In jogging or running, an individual is able to cover greater distances in a shorter period of time. Therefore, greater numbers of calories can be burned per time spent. 

3. Choreographed Aerobic Exercise 
Choreographed aerobic dance is a very popular form of exercise throughout the world. Aerobic dance helps in toning up the muscles of the body and many people find it fun to do as well. 

4. Step Aerobics 
Step aerobics incorporates the use of a step or bench typically about one foot wide and three feet long and about six inches high. Instructors use many moves that require participants to step up and down from the platform. This way, the activity will not be boring and tiring, but will be lively and motivating.

5. Water Aerobics 
Water aerobics incorporates a variety of movements from both swimming and land aerobics to develop vigorous routines that are aerobic in nature. It utilizes the resistance to movement that water creates to elevate heart rates and also helps you if balancing yourself on land is difficult. It is a good way to lose weight. 

6. Swimming 
Swimming is a very popular form of regular exercise. Due to the resistance of water, the amount of energy required to swim a certain distance is greater than that needed to run or walk the same distance. In other words, swimming can burn more calories than running per time spent.

7. Stationary Cycling/Bicycling 
Stationary cycling or bicycling are excellent forms of aerobic exercise when done continuously. Like swimming, cycling is a non weight bearing activity that builds muscular endurance and strength and improved flexibility of selected muscles of the legs and thighs. 

8. Jumping Rope 
Jumping rope can be a great aerobic workout as long as it is performed at a slow to moderate pace and is done continuously for a relatively long period of time (15 minutes or more).

The key to effective weight loss is through use of a healthy exercise program which is performed on a regular basis while following a healthy dieting & nutritional plan. Aerobic exercise is good for weight loss because it uses more calories than other activities and helps raise your metabolic rate. 

This helps your body burn calories at a faster rate. It is an effective way to lose fat only if you are motivated enough to do it frequently. Aerobics only burns fat during the workout itself. So if you want encouraging results you need to be able to exercise daily and for longer periods.

Dieting And Fitness

By Ahmed Hajouj

When it comes to living a long and healthy life, there are two necessary ingredients: diet and fitness. While some believe that they are one thing all together, nothing could be further from the truth. It is quite possible to have a perfectly healthy diet with deplorable fitness habits. It is equally possible to be very physically fit with less than savory eating habits. 

There’s a clever little line in the Jimmy Buffet song “Fruitcakes” when his ‘lady’ is lamenting: 

“I treat my body like a temple 

You treat yours like a tent”

I can’t help but think of this line whenever I think about all the people around the world who are going on these garbage in, garbage out diet plans hoping to achieve the weight loss success of those who are endorsing these products. 

To be completely honest, it is possible to shed pounds through diet alone. It is difficult but possible. It is also possible to be physically fit and have a few extra pounds hanging around. To a large degree we are what we eat. If we consume a high fat low substance diet our bodies are going to lack the fuel required to burn the fat. At the same time if we aren’t providing our bodies with the tools it needs to build muscle it doesn’t matter how many weights we lift. 

When it comes to diet and fitness, the best results are achieved when they work together rather than separately. Use your fitness routine to burn excess calories and use your diet in order to properly provide your body the nutrients and fuel it needs to build muscle. I’ve heard many times in my life that a pound of muscle weighs less than a pound of fat. While this is not true at all, a pound is a pound regardless; a pound of muscle occupies less space on the body than a pound of fat. Pound for pound, I would much rather mine be composed of muscle than fat. Dieting alone does not build muscle and that is something you will do well to remember in your efforts. 

You should also realize that as you are building muscle you may be shedding inches while not showing a great deal of progress on the scale. It is very important that you keep this in mind throughout the weight loss process. Do not measure your progress by the scales alone or you will achieve misleading results. The problem is that far too many people do just this and get frustrated and give up when they are actually making progress. Do not allow yourself to be a victim of the scales. Look in the mirror, try on your tight pants, and measure your waistline. Measure your success by how you feel after climbing a flight of stairs not by how many pounds fell of the scale this week. 

By incorporating fitness into your diet routine you are also enabling your body to burn off any extra calories you may have consumed during the day. This means that if you want to have a small ‘cheat’ during your day, you can make up for it by burning a few more calories than normal in the evening. This isn’t something that should happen often but an occasional occurrence isn’t going to make or break your diet. 

You should also look at dieting and fitness as a ball and glove type of relationship. While you can play ball without the glove, it seems to work so much better if you have both. Diet and fitness when combined can create fantastic weight loss results for those who take them both seriously. The thing to remember is that neither works as well alone and neither will work unless you are willing to do the work. You must make this a priority in your life in order to achieve the best possible results.